a Tiny description

a full time artist, stepmother, radio personality, and mom to an energetic Chug dog, tries to get through the days without committing a felonious act. My life is a rickety Zen circus.

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Thursday, August 02, 2012

the only answer

my studio is such a mess that i consider it a disrespect for the space and materials that i have been given.  in my attempt to clean & clear, it is at the stage where things must be hopped over and scooched around, and i fear i have lost the dog into the great abyss.  i am tired of it being like this - threatening to topple...things saved for Someday...but i don't even remember what they are, nor do i have a visual on them, so, quick - what's under the big roll of batting?  for $50 and the championship....no clue.  i have half - started and half- finished projects...i have never- started and never-will-start projects....all lining my wall-to-wall shelving...all collecting nests in my head....so...what to do?  chuck it all.  ALL.  nothing will remain on the shelves.  not a single feather or grain of sand.  not a typewriter or a boat light or rusty gear or paper ephemera....and i have tubs and tubs and tubs of all of it.  and seriously - how important can it be if i don't know it's there, or i haven't needed it in 3 years??  that is just nonsensical.  i started looking at it, and said "oh - wait - i'll use that...and that..."  but guess what?  If i found it once, i'll find it again.  and that leaky bag of rusty shit?  it's a leaky bag of rusty shit.  there are no magical powers in it...no spiritual answers.  and who knows what will come in once there's room?  and maybe i can put an actual comfy chair in here so i can think and read.  oh, studio...you will heart me soon.  dumpster dumpster, where for art you?  (pun intended)
BTW - the paper is gone gone gone!! thank you everyone.

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