a Tiny description

a full time artist, stepmother, radio personality, and mom to an energetic Chug dog, tries to get through the days without committing a felonious act. My life is a rickety Zen circus.

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Tuesday, September 09, 2014

the daily Tiny Steps have continued, and I have to say that some days the Tiny Step forward is to hold steady in the storm and not let my foot slip back a step.  or two.  my studio purge has slowed to a stop, and it remains in upheaval.  so today i took a hard look at the studio - the physical table and paints and tools and found objects and fabric and all that stuff, but also the idea of the studio.  i haven't done anything artmaking-wise in quite a few months, yet my plans are all trying to encompass this volume of supplies.  right now, my studio is in a 22x22 room…a Tiny House all on it's own (actually larger than most of the tiny's i've seen!).  and it holds my feet.  always has.  so is it time to choose between going tiny and having all these supplies?  is it time to sit with this for a day - but just a day - and decide which expression moves me most - collage, paint, fabric, assemblage?  each of them taps into a different feel…each one has it's place.  sometimes an idea can only be expressed by paint.  sometimes only rusty metal will do.  perhaps the answer is to find a small studio outside of the Tiny and when i feel the need to create, i can go there.  maybe keeps some small stuff at the Tiny…hand work like embroidery or crochet/knitting.  A studio would be a great way to immerse in community, also.
I connected with another woman who is building a tiny, Michelle.  when i feel overwhelmed, and like a dog chasing it's tail, i go to her blog and read a bit for re-inspiration.  Last night I discovered that my Very Own Mother thought i was just dreaming and not serious about the Tiny.  She was so unencouraging, i had to hang up the phone.  i know she goes for traditional security of a marriage, rather than building your own strength, but had thought she was behind me. (she is convinced that my stepsister's problems would all be over if she just got married).  it's a little sad to realize there really are few people who are behind me on this…who truly believe in me and my plans. not dreams, but Plans.  they once were dreams, but now i am putting my shoulder to the door and bursting through to walk the hall.  are you with me?
it's funny, but less than a decade ago, "connection" was all about having/reading blogs.  then Facebook took over, then Twitter.  people have cell phones, then texting.  now - no one talks.  it's all text and hitting a "like" button.  I call my stepdaughter and she doesn't answer the phone.  but i'll get a text in a minute or two after.  at first, my feelings were hurt.  but then i realized that's just the way of communication today.  i'm old fashioned for having this blog, actually.  but i like it that way.  i still say that if you're too busy to pick up the phone and say hello, then you're too busy to be my friend.  but on a lighter note…my job goes well & i love it.  maybe the creativity in my job serves the same purpose as my studio?  hmm.  a thought to think in the shower and through the woods with Henry…if i can wake him up, beautiful dreamer that he is….

speaking of beautiful dreams…dream on, dream until your dreams come true….doesn't look so Tiny, eh?


3 comments:

Kim Mailhot said...

Don't ever give up, Beautiful Dreamer.
If tiny fills your soul, it is the dream worth making come true.

Denise Feldman said...

Definitely behind you! One tiny step at a time...

Caroline said...

Let me know when it's time to swing a hammer for you... though I can't guarantee my aim will be perfect (keep your fingers out of my way), I can try for you!