i really try...

I do. I try to wake up, and be still, and pray/meditate/seek direction. but i don't seem to be able to pull it off...too many things swirling - coffee to pour, feeding of furry ones, feeding of self, potty breaks...oy. and i felt pretty guilty, having wanted to start my day with a prayer of gratitude and gentle direction to listen for. and i realized, finally, that after the furbabes are fed, and i have a warm mug of coffee in my hands, i can sit outside for a while, in my bathrobe of course, and listen to the birds waking up and getting busy, and smell the flowers in my garden wafting their scent to me, and hear the buzzing of the fat bumblebees starting their day. and in those moments, i don't need to form words and make logical prayer, because my heart is saying all that needs to be said...the deepest expression of my gratitude for those moments, and the time to relax in them, is being spoken by my spirit. and it was at that epiphenous moment that i realized that i had, indeed, entered in to worship. and that the prayer of my heart was answered. and that the rest of the words i would think to speak would be more like a Dear Santa list, rather than a conversation with Divine. it is in those moments when my thoughts are stilled and my mind is receptive. and in that time when my truest expression of art begins to bubble. and what better answer to any un-prayed prayer?