today I am thankful for 2 words: YES POSSIBILITIES also for the unlimited, unbridled joy & relief of being on track. can i tell you? YOU are so special & unique in all the world...and know, like I have re-learned this week, that your journey is not without apparent twists and bumps and some miserable moments. and i say "journey" as a person follows an outline of: realize there's a path/purpose for you, then try to find the start of the trail, then follow it to the destination, and BINGO! there's your purpose! nope. someone far wiser than I said that "the journey is part of the destination." so true. the nasties that come to trample on your zen moments where you swear you feel like Mary Tyler Moore throwing her beret in the air and you own the whole wide world? those crappy buzz-kill moments are part of the journey? yeah. those bliss-buster moments are part of the journey. will they make you stronger for an even bigger challenge/reward ahead? hopefully. i don't know your purpose/path, so i can't say. for me, it's only when the bigger challenge comes that i realize, ah ha! that happened before, so that this could happen now and not crush me. and learn from both experiences. sometimes i learn to not wince and whine and twist away from a challenging time, knowing it is there to make me stronger. honestly? sometimes i just wince and whine. twisting away is impossible though. whatever the "it" is, will still be there waiting, it seems, like a bad blind date you forgot to cancel, ringing the doorbell, wearing his best polyester suit. it sounds strong and favorable to say that i recognize these challenges for what they are, and welcome them for what they will teach me. truth? i really would prefer fewer ripples and high tides that engulf me and absolute tsunamis of the soul, where no amount of reasoning or meditation or mindfulness or puppy love & tea can save my balance. those moments where everything is just shit. and we all have them. i guess the trick is knowing that you hold on, and the water will recede...that the coast guard will come in some form, if need be, and you will survive. and honestly, life would be emptier and less colorful. the best view is from the top of the mountain. getting to the top is hard work. trust me - i've hiked the Adirondacks. i tend to overpromise and overbook, not wanting to disappoint someone who wants a special necklace, or print, or what-have-you. i tend to want to enjoy everything i can that life has to offer, that i want to do. but i can't. and time is what it is...there are only enough hours in a day to do what you can. i have learned to balance out time in the studio with time relaxing. an imbalance creates a space where neither time is productive. I found myself at Walmart last night at 11pm buying office supplies. i had gotten up at 4am and started in the studio. but that's how i'm wired. i am super excited about a design i'm working on and couldn't stop. i did pause my day to take a 20 minute nap around 3pm, and did take 2 walks through the woods with diva. and some days are just doomed from the start, and meant only for staying in bed watching endless movies and being a princess. lovin' me those days, too! i'm so totally off whatever track i started off on, but you're used to that with me, so i offer no apologies or recriminations if you actually left a while ago to check out a better blog. but, this is what it is. i've been up since 5am and worked for a few hours. am sitting at my desk, with a cat on the back of my chair "combing" my hair, and diva dog sleeping under my printer table to the right side of me. there's a (thankfully) cool breeze coming in my studio windows, and my iPod is set on random (making for an odd sensibility when Mary J Blige follows sanskrit kirtan!) the sun is just rising high enough to dapple my curtains and cast a shadow or two on my mannequin forms to my left. time for a peanut butter and banana sandwich, some fresh coffee, and more work! say YES today to all the possibilities, those known and those yet to come. and watch your heart fill.