Monday, March 02, 2015
I had the singular pleasure of spending an annual fall week in the New Hampshire woods with Jonatha and 149 other women…making art…making friends, lifelong strong bonds…learning our Selves…breaking open, expanding, healing…and eating the most fantastic food every prepared. I haven't been back in a number of years, and the focus and fizz has changed a bit, but it stays in my heart…a warm little thump-thump that can sneak up on me and fill my eyes from time to time…it's the, well, everythingness of it…the smell of pine and balsam and the water lapping at the back door step and the incessant howling of laughter from warm-lit cabins at night - and these are the darkest of dark nights, with no street to light…the clink of wineglasses…the crackle of huge fireplace fires…the sharing of snacks and stories and hearts…i miss this…but it taught me what i needed to create and make space for in my "regular" life. and i have. except for a rock star serenading us around a wild campfire, i have created a circle of women who want to gather and get messy together - heart-wise and paint-wise. and as i look for my next roof, i am consciously aware of my safety zones…the need for financial safety balanced with room to gather. what am i willing to sacrifice of one to have the other? because in my world right now, as it is evolving, there won't be room for both to the fullest that i would want. maybe. i am visualizing what i want…have been for years. and am ready to take a step toward a good compromise - one that is comfortable in every sense. i giggle.
at 9:22 AM