a Tiny description

a full time artist, stepmother, radio personality, and mom to an energetic Chug dog, tries to get through the days without committing a felonious act. My life is a rickety Zen circus.


Tuesday, December 03, 2013

it starts today

As Henry and i were walking through the woods today, i realized how i've been talking about getting fit and healthy again.  talking about it. not doing anything about it.  just talking.  and the past few days, i've made inquiry at a kickboxing place that I'm familiar with.  and a new 24/7 gym nearby. and as i ate a handful of hershey kisses, thought about eating healthier.
then i realized some amazing truths.
Way back when, around 6 years ago, i set a goal to quit smoking by September.  that left me 9 months to quit.  i was going away to an art retreat and didn't want to be the only smoker.  as i usually was.  and i did it.  i went back and forth with smoking & quitting until last year, when i quit for good.  despite the temptation to start again.  often.
So why not set a goal of losing x-number of pounds by June, when I return to the same art retreat?  And rather than make it a pain in the ass, make it a daily choice.  Every day, wake up and say "it starts today."  so that day's goal will be a proper fitness and nutritional balance.  there are no "cheat" days, because each day is a choice whether or not it will be healthy choices or not.  so no feelings of LOSER or disappointment in myself (goodness knows there are plenty of other folks feeling disappointed in me, so that lane is filled with traffic and needs no more).  good.  i smile.  this will work.  the worst part about starting a new way of doing things is that it seems monumental.  (notice i did not say "quitting" or  "habit").  Like saying, "I'm going to be vegan, starting tomorrow."  and all you see is 30 years of no porterhouse. or removing sugar from your diet and honestly, for me, all i can think of is birthday cake in all it's forms.  every minute.  from that minute forward through eternity.  so if every day is a choice, then it is so do-able.  i can do anything for a day. (mostly).  and like when i quit smoking, i woke up and said "let's see how long I can go without a cigarette, and then i'll smoke."  and 1 day became 2 became 3 till it seemed silly to waste the effort.  and the clean smelling hair.  and the real Chanel #5 I treated myself to (from France - the imported Chanel has a different formula, I found out from a perfumerie).
and there are so many good things to eat that aren't gravy-laden…tacos, spaghetti squash, roasted veggies (oh god! try roasting radishes! they get sweet)…you get the point.  now me and cupcakes will need a talk.  my downfall.  there is nothing i don't like about cupcakes plural.  so they will need to taunt someone else, and i bet i can eat just 1.
so it starts today.  i will respect my body's limitations right now, but i will honor it's former athletic self. we will meet in the middle.  (did you know i used to figure skate with an Olympic Gold medalist? hard to believe now, but soon….)
what would you start if you knew it was just for a day?

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