well, i had a really cool pictures of the snow falling mightily on my kayaks. but my phone and computer just aren't speaking (still) so imagine this: yesterday morning smelled of spring - even the honking of returning geese filled the lake. every sense was filled to bursting with freshness, and the sun warmed my back as diva and I made our trek through the woods. Right In Front Of Us, barred owl swooped toward an unsuspecting squirrel, but pulled up short and returned to his tree where the path makes a turn toward the second pond, and evergreen give way to birches and cherry trees and ancient oaks. treetops filled with song and the icy skim on the lake began transforming itself into soft undulations. bucolic, right? a few hours later, BAM! a clap of thunder came suddenly overhead, bringing a blinding flash of lightning. the house shivered almost as much as diva. then rain. the cold, pelting kind that slaps your face and finds a path to trickle down your back as you bend your head to escape it's slap. then the wind began, tossing trees branches to the ground, as they dared to swell with early buds. gusty howling drove rain sideways, making me fear for diva as she reluctantly went out back for a last potty break before bed. this morning...snow covering my waiting kayaks. so it appears that we shall have all 4 seasons every day - something for everyone. Thursday, i participated in a webinar featuring one of my favorite people on earth: Christine Mason Miller. we ran through one of the exercises in her book, Desire to Inspire. (which you should own). it seemed simple and crafty on the face of it, and a lot of fun. but then you got to thinking. and you know the trouble i can get into when i get all thought up, right? but back to the webinar. she had us pick 5 characters from fiction, history, movies, etc, that we admired. for the sake of time we narrowed it to 2. then we wrote the name of each on separate pieces of paper (or your journal, if you're a journaler). then list the characteristics of each...then list a defining moment or quote in the book/film, etc, that speaks to you. then we pretended that we had an opportunity to sit with that "person." what would they say to you? (i may have these instructions a little sideways - so much has happened since thursday). It was clutch time, and i had to think quick, so of course i came up with...nothing. well, not nothing nothing. but nothing that would wouldn't reveal me to be the trash-movie watcher that i am...nothing, umm, smart. but i wanted to participate. so i said Be Damned to my inner critic, and picked a character that has haunted me since i first saw the movie of the same name: Precious. if you saw the movie, you know there are parts that are almost heartbreakingly unwatchable. and yet, Precious just goes about her day, slogging through whatever has to get done...wearing any anger or hurt under the protection of many layers of clothes and body. yet she is gentle and patient with life - makes no excuses, just does what she knows is right and does what she can with what's handed her. in her circumstance, she has a sense of ownership of her life, even though her circumstance is pitched wildly out of her control. yet she waits for her opportunities, even though she has no indication or expectation that things will ever change....she just hangs on moment by moment. so, i got to the part in the exercise where we write down what our "person" says to us. and the filtered down-to-it's-essence version is: Keep going. you just have to keep going. and i realized what great advice that is...to stop when faced with challenge leaves you sitting in the muck. go through, keep going. much like the pelting rain/sleet/snow of yesterday...rather than stand there bitching about how much i hated the icy drips down my neck, i had to keep going til i got home, or stand there getting soaked and battered like some sort of human pinata, while nature had her way with me. the other thing i admired about Precious was that she was pretty much derided by every person she came in contact with (except her school counselor Maria Carey with no makeup), but you got a feeling that she still didn't bother with pondering if she was better or worse than anyone else....she just ...was. i won't spoil the ending, but it's a deceptively simple film. difficult to watch in some parts, but worth staying with. In the webinar, we made small index card collages of the word(s) of wisdom (well i didn't actually do it then because i had no idea we needed supplies ready before the webinar, but i did it later). loved it! Thank you Swirly and Create Mixed Media! Later in the evening, I watched Moneyball, totally procrastinating taxes and reworking a painting (but honestly - if the roof was going to blow off the house, the last place i wanted to be was on the top floor). same kind of theme here - the Brad Pitt character made the best of his circumstance, believed so strongly in the direction he wanted to go and plowed through...even though it could likely get him fired and blacklisted in baseball. but - the flip side of the risk was changing the way baseball was done. and that risk was worth it to him. he was all in. i know i'm rambling. sorry. and it's time to hit the canvas without tying these thoughts up in a nice bow. but maybe there is no nice bow. maybe i just drank too much coffee this morning. and these are just some thoughts escaping the hamster wheel through my fingers. but the wind howling outside makes me feel cozy inside, in my studio, and the allure of quin nickel azo gold is just too hard to resist. wishing you a day of certainty, even in the face of changing windstorms....