The very purpose of spirituality is self-discipline. Rather than criticizing others, we should evaluate and criticize ourselves. Ask yourself, what am I doing about my anger, my attachment, my pride, my jealousy? These are the things we should check in our day to day lives.

with love from the Dalai Lama yes yes yes. i know. and i have the mark on my forehead from where the words hit me. not so much acting like an ass, but feeling moody and yes, i guess angry. at who? at what? when push comes to shove, who knows? (hmmmm - push comes to shove...a lovely & peaceful phrase). I do know this...when something is wrong wrong wrong for me to do, or there is a person that is not quite what they represent, my internal radar goes off big. and i feel such a strong emotional response toward that person or path or decision, that it borders on repulsion. (more lovely visuals). not "repulsion" in the gag reflex way - but more like a force field pushing me away. that's the best way i can describe it. i have felt this toward people who i now call "friend," but at that time and place, it was important for some reason that i Not Go There. it is such a definite NO! that hits my system, that to go forward would be such an obvious mistake. (not that i haven't boldly put my shoulder to the hurricane and pushed into the storm before). but there has been such a chain of these NO NO NO's lately, as everything shifts, it has made me downright grouchy at times. so i had to sit with my inner tantrum this morning to see what it was trying to tell me...i'm not normally a person to have expectations on other people's behavior or how they run their lives, but lately it seems that things have been so delineated - so black OR white - and i've been fighting against it inside...fighting to reclaim that part of me that lives-and-lets-live. so i went to have a chat with this inner tasmanian devil, no longer fearing what i'd find, (that maybe age has morphed me into a bitch), but more to untangle, unclog, put into perspective. and i began to remember how years ago, i had asked for a "clear and definite voice" to guide my feet on the right path. i am here to say that there is no clearer voice than the turbulence that gets itself all het up in me when there is something to avoid. and i had a sense as the new year dawned, that this year Big and Fast Changes were to be afoot. and so it seems they are. now that there has been all this clearing & purging of issues and material things, there is a void. and that void needs to be filled carefully...not just bringing in new stuff and re-filling it, but perhaps bringing back in only the essentials, and leaving some breathing space...some windows for the sun to peek in and glow around everything. i watched a new show called Touch the other night. In it, there is a child who hasn't spoken in 10 years or more - his whole life. and the father figures out how his son is actually communicating. and that's what i have to be quiet & peaceful with - what is my intuition and God trying to tell me? there are clear directions, if i listen, if i allow myself stillness. and it seems nothing will move forward until i do. i have a GPS in my car that i couldn't live without. but it just tells me the next turn to take. and i need the full map right now - the fold-out kind that never re-folds the way it should, but shows the whole route so you can plan potty breaks and stops at Interesting Sights. coincidentally, I just won a copy of Jill Berry's book "Personal Geographies," which is about mapping your life in art. i never win anything, and there was a huge huge pool of people on this webinar call. and i won. how's that for a clear bell? sorta like standing in the tower of Big Ben at noon. so this is what my stillness brought to me today. my uneasiness...feeling like a spider monkey on Mountain Dew... child-in-grocery-store-past-naptime inner tantrum - it seems it was a call to Be Quiet and Be Still and Be Thoughtful for a few minutes or so, and sort out the map...find the route and mark it in highlighter, THEN engage the GPS for turn-by-turn directions. and in that perspective, it will all work. even when the GPS says "cannot locate satellite. this will end directions temporarily," and i have to punt quickly or miss the entrance ramp. wishing you clear sailing and warm breezes and maps that refold with ease....