lately i have had little inclination to head to my studio. and have respected that wish of my spirit. a resting time. it did not come with the usual frustration, merely an acceptance of a time to rest. yet i wondered why...with the earth taking a rest under frozen ground and snow, this usually heralds a productive time - too cold to play outside, so the games begin indoors. and although i'm not sure of the answer, an inkling became clear as i stood outside in the dark this early darkness. see, i make art from my soul...and take the things that catch in the net of my dreams and thoughts and spirit, and form them into a ball in my mind...much like picking up bits of dough from a flour-covered countertop while making cookies...taking the parts left behind after the cookie shape has been placed on the baking sheet and representing those things in an artful way. lately, the things that catch in my spirit are not so much bits, but full aroma sensory gifts...the christmas lights shining through a frosted window...the woodsmoke curling above a log home in the woods...my diva's eyes as they try unsuccessfuly to stay open & watchful...the most beautifully scented candle i have ever smelled...the light shining from (and around) my newly declared sister Baby Betty and her Sid. these things melt and meld in my heart and are Plenty and Enough...I find no need to translate them with my hands...they are Special Moments that feel too precious right now to give form to and share...my spirit is bursting with the gratitude of these things...feeling humbled by the gifts given to my heart. today, we buried my husband's grandmother. she was 98. in front of a packed room, Sid spoke in his native language (Akwasasne/Onondaga) to grandma, and then to us in our language...both times i had a sense of knowing...he spoke of her kindness and openness...of welcoming him to the family instantly and without reserve or questioning...her knack for creating family out of thin air, and with her spirit's force, these new members were folded into the family as if they had been born of her and raised side by side with the rest. I stood next to Sid and Baby Betty later. none of us talking. none of us needing to. and quietly Sid said that our spirits join when there is quiet. and Baby Betty and I each took a step closer to him and hugged. just standing there encompassing. it was a day of back patting and shoulder squeezes and full out hugs....each watching out for another, yet allowing the quiet...a usually boistrous group of Irish Catholics, these core family members, respected the quietness that the day asked for...old hurts and grudges set to the side, as ex-wives and former boyfriends came to honor grandma...so big was her spirit, that even in death, she drew each of us to her and her spirit reigned over the day...people long gone from the family, joined hands and hearts with her sons and grandchildren and great grandchildren and (yes) great great grandchildren. she was called Great Great by most. just Great Great. i like that. she was tickled by it. it was a fitting name. and so it was a full day. i left the church entry, packed my step-daughter into her car wishing her a safe trip back to school, looked up at the sun, and respected the quiet...i turned left instead right at the driveway, heading home and leaving work to get by on it's own. knowing the brashness and frenzy of the office would be an offense to the quiet settled in my spirit this day. such gifts i have been given. and i wish you the Quiet of your Spirit...even in the midst of the neon and noise...may you find a bit or a piece to pull from your net and nest it away in a Special Place in your heart...namaste...peace...and many many hugs. L.