a Tiny description

a full time artist, stepmother, radio personality, and mom to an energetic Chug dog, tries to get through the days without committing a felonious act. My life is a rickety Zen circus.


Wednesday, November 28, 2012

this blog is just so emotional to me...i can't explain why, but i have such a reaction to it...almost as if i was homesick for the places she shows, but i've never been there.  hard to explain.  go look.  so i'm trying to get ready for 4 days in nyc.  you know me - an uber planner.  that means that by today, i'm freaked out with what i haven't done to get ready.  and this will include random things like ALL my christmas shopping, or all the laundry, etc etc...it's like that commercial with the big snowball rolling down the hill.  i don't just need to throw some jeans and a few sweaters in a duffel and go.  oh no, not me.  i can't even detail it, because it would make me tired.  some days i like my quirks for what they help me accomplish.  some days, i just get tired.  so today i will scrap everything and go to my friend Rika's shop and, well, shop.  then head to the Cafe for a latte and lunch and a secret drop off.  shhh.  feeling tired and hurty and that's making me all emotional these days, so i'll keep moving till i snap out of it.  but nap extravagantly. maybe call a wrap wench for a pedi....hmmmm. AND am headed to buy some knitting needles.  sat down to knit yesterday, and my needle case is missing.  with all my lovely bamboo needles that i've collected in the past few years.  gggrrr.  so a trip to the yarn shop is in order too.  better get a move on!

some thoughts sneaking in...giving me glimpses of themselves, and will soon be front and center and needing to be recognized and dealt with.  As i purged through my studio recently, i realized there were purges in other areas of my life to deal with, as well.  one of those involves my address book.  i know i've mentioned this before, but as the thoughts surrounding this gel more, i share.  there is the poem about old friends/new friends, silver & gold, etc etc.  and perhaps there is truth to that, but it seems like a friend from old, that doesn't make the effort to stay in touch, well, it's hurtful, and being busy is just not an excuse.  i'm sorry, but it isn't.  so i look at the effort extended vs. the effort returned.  And honestly, there are some relationships that will have to be dimmed...where the golden thread will have to be dropped...perhaps their purpose in each others' lives has finished.  and not in a chip-on-the-shoulder way...

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